Too afraid to make mistakes. :)

today is the 3rd day ever since we didn't message each other. by the way. don't think he even care right? i suppose it's a yes. i still remembered last time i used to ask him will he forget me if we did not contact me for a moment. and he said yes. never taught the ending could be like that. i always wanted a happy ending. and wonder what did i ever done wrong. fine. forget about it. grow up girl. you deserve a better life. after this 3 days. many things came
up to my mind. and in the sudden i felt so grown up. i actually had many things to do. with people around me. life is so much fun then.

you know what. seriously i don't think i done any wrong. and at the same time when a friend asks and i ask. he can go out with his friends and not with me. how sad is that. :/ and he don't mind how much he spends with his friends but i guess he counts every buck he spent with me. seriously i felt very stupid. can't believe a gf is nothing compared to a friend.

WAIT WAIT WAIT.

why am i still thinking about this. he can let go of this so so EASILY why can't me. right?

not crying over it anymore. it's a good thing i guess. :D

had a very fun day out with MAYE!! :D but failed to even capture a picture together. never even went in any single fitting room although we almost went in every shop. how fail is that. and this is the very first time i went back home with 2 hairbands that cost me RM10. and also few "siew paos" for parents. i taught i did spent all the money i had in the purse. :D good for me i guess. :D that's because i knew i'm gonna spend more on the upcoming week. it's my sem break kay... :P

will be going to genting on upcoming thursday and friday. :) really hope i enjoy. was still wondering to bring my DSLR or not. since it's the first time overnight with uni friends. hope parents let cause i'm gonna sit train and bus there. :/

seriously hope all this could let me forget all the sad stuffs. :D

will upload more after the wedding dinner tonight. :D

NEW DAY NEW HOPE!!! :)

A brand new welcome to the owner..

guess what... i decided to start blogging in my own blog again. instead of a blog that are not even exposed to the public. i'll make this a very small diary of mine since i have a lappy with me and i can update everything in very easily.. but of course with the help of internet!! :D

btw... love isn't a very easy thing to go through.. and i never put too much hope on it this time. so i never felt as bad as how i felt last year. felt so stupid duh. if it was a "third person" appearing in the relationship well. i've got nothing to say. never taught about that. seriously, i felt so lost in a sudden. felt like being cheated. but why?? and the funniest thing is i never get an explanation for that. grow up la please. everytime problem comes and the first thing you do is to keep it. people improve with mistakes kay. and i seriously don't understand any single thing you are doing to me. do i really d

eserve all this?? you've changed. to a person i felt so lost. i would prefer better if you'd tell out everything and even if quarrel happens i'm really fine with it. i accept that. but what's all this?? mistak

e of a person's over felt??

give it a damn kay.

even a friend treats me better than you.

if i'm so troublesome to you then just go away. i don't need you to cut my heart anymore.

stay or leave.

16 more days left!!
let's work towards the end.. =D
all the best to everyone and especially to him. =D

take care.

hugggsss and kisses...
=D

I am a honey bee
Shunned off from the colony
And they won’t let me in
So I left the hive
They took away all my stripes
And broke off both my wings
So I’ll find another tree
And make the wind my friend
I’ll just sing with the birds
They’ll tell me secrets off the world

But my other honey bee
Stuck where he doesn’t wanna be
Oh my darling honey bee
I’ll come save you
Even if it means I’ll have to face the queen

So I’ll come prepared
My new friends say they would help me
Get my loved one back
They say it isn’t right
The bees have control of your mind
But I choose not to believe that
So we’ll meet in the darkness of the night
And I’ll promise I will be there on time
We’ll be guided by my new friends the butterflies
Bring us back to our own little hive

Oh my other honey bee
No longer stuck where he doesn’t wanna be
Oh my darling honey bee
I have saved you
And now that you’re with me
We can make our own honey


*winks* in love with this song.. =D

know why it's raining just now?? because someone's sad... because someone's crying.... i enjoy standing under the rain because i know nobody would ever stand there under the heavy rain so that nobody ever realise that i'm crying...


now i realise something very important...
i know what to do next... ='(


ps: thx waiyang kai kor.. =)

PaTieNce! =D

i'll try my best to control my anger and emotions for the upcoming days.. will stop joining in to gossip d.. =( feels bad when i think back..

need his encouragements.. XD

i had drop enough of tears and i hope it doesn't continues...

seriously i hate 2010!! it makes my life so so so much harder and miserable...

actually i do hope for getting NS... and my grandma will like it so much... she always tell my aunts that i'm gonna go take the guns and those... and she will be end up smiling there.... haha... but too bad tak kena... kinda disappointing tough... i feels like experiencing times taking real guns and playing around there... keep wondering... wonder how it'll be like.. makes me feel bit bad.. =/

my dad seriously hopes that i get 9A+..... he's mad... i dun even taught of 5A+.. and even 10A(no matter + or -) it's like kinda hard for me d... =( i'll seriously be a real real bookworm to get that... but what's stopping me is my laziness.. semakin suka tidur... =P haha.. when geram d will terus run in bathroom and shower with super duper cold water... teehee... =D hope that helps..

and piano exam's around the corner... but my teacher dun even take it seriously and simply cancel my class because of being really busybody... arrgg.. and my dad will scold me for that... haiz... i'll try my very best to score at least merit for my upcoming exam.. although i hope it would be my 4th distinction but i guess this time it's though.... teacher never gave me enough practices compared to last time.. and she loves to compare me with her really smart student... just because i failed the theory paper and she treated me like diff.. just blame yourself for that.... i know u taught all but when? the very last minute and u vomitted everything to me... as if i'm ur rubbish bin like that... haiz...

ps: i was told that life at 17 was not suppose to be as though as i felt now... haiz..

imy.. XD