just don't understand things well.... as some of my friends know... i'm seriously preparing for 4 music exams next year... i know the whole year i'm gonna suffer... cos i've got music exams and spm... so it's kinda scary whenever i think of that...

recently, i just got my grade 8 practical exam pieces and of course i was asked to start preparing by now.... so of course i do have to practice... and the weird thing is... my dad force me to practice everyday... where mostly of my friends just relax there... well... i dun really mind bout that... what really matters me is when ever i've got new song to play of course i'll just go slowly and catch everything in it... and here comes my mum.. she will like keep saying y u playing so bad?? and from that moment my mood turn bad!! seriously bad... u know when people are enjoying learning something new and u just say something bad of course pple will just get frustrated.... okay...watever.... and this really makes me dun feel like trying to play any new songs.... cos if i ever play wrong den she will start saying again.. i just don't understand y she can't think from my angle... i know i'm not as pro as what she wants me to be... i know i'm not that smart and talented.... but just let me enjoy my learning process... and another thing... just don't understand y she alwayz like to compare me and others.... even in my studies... and of course my piano skills... i know u really want me to be that successful... but i just need time... just please do not ever compare me with others... okay?? i really don't like this... God created everyone differently and everyone have their own specialty... it just depends on how you look at things....

well... just gonna say that i do really love to explore more in musics... but sometimes i'm really not in the mood... i have emotions too... =)
and that's me...

ps : this post is kinda meaningless... i just dunno what to say... =)

lazyness in me

really lazy wan to update my blog lar... actually i alwayz love to update my blog.... butttttt....... cos of my restriction for online-ing.... so i can't on that much... and oh ya... there are so many stuffs in my mind this few days... and i dunno even y this will happen to me... just dun understand a lot of things... sometimes i may seeing like i dun care... but after some time den i regreted for not asking why for that.... sesat lar....and can't really manage my stuffs properly... i'm going to be insane soon.... haha.... :) sooooooo super many things happen... and i planned a lot of stuffs lar... some stupid ideas come in my mind also.... haha....... currently i made myself a new wishlist.... will post it after i feel that it's really wat i wan...... haha.... and still the same... desperate for precious moments, moody bear... this is the so call collection.... YA..... i always wanted a glass cabinet to display my collection... hope daddy 's buying for me... blek.... :) and also desperate for DLSR (i think it's in that way lar).... :) and also currently wondering should i ask for every answer that i wanted to know... sesat lar... i just keep everything to me... if anyone can read my mind that person will be amaze till got stroke.... :) sesated.....

k lar.... not much time left... talking for fun... just want everything to go smoothly as i taught... :) thx...

anger

isshh... really angry lar... everytime also being the victim wan lor..and yet i have to smile and say it's okay.... really hate that feeling lor... y nobody can really understands me.... just dun get so stresed up lar.... and not that i cant do wat u wan... is sometimes i really no mood to do it ma.... den u also cannot care me more like that.... u dun even understands wat i really want!!!! super stu lar.... SESAT!!!!!!!!!!!!! if u so smart den u understand me 1st lar... i was like being really stu to say sorry at most of the times... just wish today is a nightmare.... and u taught oni u'll get angry meh?? i also got feelings wan ler.... can't u just tolerate more.....

really hate it!!!!

ps: just wanted to express my anger to someone..... still deedee is the best... but it comes back to me = nothing happen.... sesated...

results results results...

i'm really very fobia of getting results now... haha.... dunno y even those not important wan kinda scare will fail also... haha.... but thank God this time's exam no fail!! yeah.... really very anti-fail wan lor... especially bm.... can't afford to fail bm.... but who knows end up got 58 also... haha... not bad lar.... better a lot than i expected... :) anyway... although this time's result no fail but then still like shit.... oni got 1 a1 and that wan also cos teacher change the marks system.... dunno y... den a2 also very few not even 5... haiz... and others mostly 50+ wan... sap pai lar.... everytime also like shit wan.... especially bio... really anti bio ad lar.... luckily this time din fail.... i'm very sure wat subject to drop now... BIO!!! hate u!! :)

and then get all the results ad... except bi.... haiya... expected ad wan... everytime also get that wan last wan.... tea super busy wan dei..... haha.... just hope can get a lil a2?? i dun mind if it's 70 also lar... haiya... b also not bad lar... but then better not a c... haiz.... so overall of my results is okay lar.... but if i let mummy know my marks she'll surely scold at me wan... especially acc and the chemist.... later sure say go tuition also no use wan.... haiz... watever lar... everytime i can just stand there and let my pareants say oni.... and even if i get 58 for my bm... which i feel kinda proud of it ad... where others fail..... but still my parents'll say wan lor... haiz... they never understand me lar...

but something really make me super happy yesterday night... suppose to be a super happy night... but end up like nothing... cha dao.... haiz... yesterday actually wan go the chiliung pasar malam wan... which i super duper missed?? haha... but then really lazy lar... some more legs super pain... makes me dun feel like walking oni... so end up din go lor.... den kena scold by dad also.. cos for asking mum to go... stu wan.... den i really bad mood ad wan... den later my piano teacher called... i knew it's bout today's class cannot make it ad wan lor.. den i sun pian ask the thoery results... den she told me i get DISTINCTION!!! wow... i was like YEAH!!! den later she go tell me... "i taught i told u before ad??" den i wan like NO!!! really cha dao... sesated at the moment.... den she say my marks was 93 lor... but i dunno over wat ler... :) den tat time tell mummy... i purposely make it gan chong wan.. but then bro end up asking... wat wat not mummy.... den when i say i get distinction den they react nothing.... really very cha dao lor.... no congrats at all... hmmph.... fine... i memang expected that type of reaction ad wan.... den when i tell "him"... den he react nothing also... geram betul.... den tat time he kinda busy.... so din really chat also... but at least he got ask me lar.. like good or not and so on... better than mummy they all kua... :)

still figuring out how to tell my parents bout my mid year exam marks... really complicated lar... haiz... just wish pple understand me more.... even him!! :)

k lar... guess.... nothing much to really say ad...
-to be continue-
:)

wishes and dreams.... collectibles...

my collectable stuffs lists....
1. precious moments
2. moody bear
3. me-to-you bears (so called tatty bears also).
4. car figures
5. action figures
6. music books
7. yet to be added..

:)

gua tempurung trip...

on the 1st and 2nd june... went gua tempurung with school friends and some other school students..... and some of my school's teacher went also... woke up around 5 like that... and i almost late for the time of arrival.... cos i forgotten my sandals... so have to turn back and take... :)

1st day.... sit right behind there..... kinda fun lar.... was alone at the beginning then got pple teman me lar... now i realise that cheah yi scared at me... haha.... haiya... wat ever lar... :) den reached the gua around 10 plus i guess.... forget ad.... den went it there.... hmmm... i would just describe the cave as a wonderful place.... never regret at all.... feel like goin in again.... at the beginning i taught was like super scary.... cos memang no nothing wan u know... no lights all.. den no stairs all also... den the tour guide some more scare us... say if talk too loud then later all the animals will come out wan... den me and kaili really scared la... haha... den in front of us is sau pang den kaili keep pulling his shirt... den later on she follow weeseh... den i simply lar.... we like sesat here and there wan.... errr.... i would just divide the cave into 2 lar... i knw there are a lot of part.... well the 1st part is from the entrance of couse... den to a so called river.... den we rest there lar.... and something really big happened to me... haha... den after that i followed ming hui and shienrun they all lor... well... 2nd part of the cave is much more easier... no mouse hole and jumping from top anymore... it's all staircase... but it's alltogether 1050 steps... walk till die.. haha.... but then we stopped at the platforms lar.... den the tour guide keep creating the stories lar.... some kinda logic lar... quite funny also... inside the cave really very nice lar... but then din manage to bring a camera in... so.... din get to capture anything...



the view of the cave outside....











after lunch... went to the so called bungalow or semi-d lar... but actaully it's a house lar... very diff from wat imagined... :) den went to the waterfall... very nice... :) den night sleep around 1 plus.. actually dun wan sleep and cannot sleep wan... but then my allergy come again.. so have to lor... haiz... and end up oni sleep for 2 hours like that...

second day.... went the kampar medan selera there to have breakfast... super cheap and delicious lar the food there......... after that went to the hot spring... but then end up mostly at the cold spring part..... got went through the whole park ad lar... worth it lar.... very nice... how ncie if i know how to swim... sure very nice wan.... haiz.... never mind... i'll learn!!! :)
after everything....

CHao... balik liao... :)

the end of the trip...

i'm back!!

:) wonder did i lost somewhere?? really very lazy wan upload... haha... but someone requested.... well... i'll just briefly talk bout my holidays.... and a few days before that.... :)

the friday before holiday... meaning the last day of school lar...
we gals planned to giv a surprise party for jess... and end up she tell me that she early ad know... sesated lar.... never once the surprise party was truly surprise wan.... must really plan nicely lor... :) anyway.... taht day maye bought 2 cakes... which i really think very wierd bout it.... theres the peanut and the cappucino flavour wan... i think i'll prefer the cappucino wan better...... after school we gals... the gang lar... went to station 1... kinda sesat.... actually wen to the red island cafe wan... den sit there ad... den at last we decided to come out from there... there not bad lar... but dunno expensive o not lar.... haha... took some pictures...


me and maye's drinks...












i ordeder this... jumbo saussages.... not bad lar.... if compared to the german saussages still i prefer the german wan.... :)









and some random pictures....

our pictures.... haha.....



































































that's all for the friday events..... :)